💔 5 Steps to Reverse “I Don’t Love You Anymore”

“I don’t love you anymore.” The point of no return right?

Chris did not see this one coming…

But with the amount of cases and marriage issues that we review from time to time, these issues do not just fall out of the skies.

So I asked Chris,

“Are you telling me that your wife has never complained before telling you she doesn’t love you anymore?”

Then he goes…

“I mean… she’s complained about a few minor things that were no big deals. Why are women inconsiderate with reality though?”

I asked him if he asked the question exactly like that to his wife. 

He went on and on about how she nagged constantly about quality time.

“So what do you want Chris?” I asked,

He said, “I need her to stop nagging because frankly, I’ve got bills to worry about.”

So I asked… “You don’t care about seducing her into falling in love with you again?”

“Seduction? What are we? Teenagers?”

And then I answered with another question…

“Do you want an answer to that or do you want to reverse this terrible experience with your marriage?”

Like many people in modern marriages, Chris is confused and we want to share the 5 steps we shared with him to reverse 

“I don’t love you anymore.”

My name is LOLA and I am the co-author of the book

GET MY MARRIAGE BACK 

…with my husband OLA

…which you can download for free at:

www.GetMyMarriageBack.com

You will also see an opportunity to book a coaching session with us.

This is OLA

Step 1 – Accept It

PREVIOUS POST: 💔 5 Steps To Dealing With a Disrespectful Wife

The usual confusion here is when people feel like accepting reality equals agreement to being wrong or to the experience they are trying to avoid.

If you feel this way, you are essentially focused on the wrong thing.

You would be actively defending yourself but not your relationship.

The reason why you should accept reality is because it is reality; it simply is.

It will also conclude this phase of the present funk a lot quicker than being stubborn about nothing.

I know like most people, you probably have a corrupted version of reality.

Can you at least accept the reality of the fact that your partner just expressed that they are no longer in love with you?

When your spouse comes to you and tells you he or she is no longer in love with you, the easiest route to take for most humans is to get defensive.

So it’s key in this key moment to rise above the norm and by doing so, your spouse will wonder and that’s the equivalent to building attraction back.

That is a scientific fact.

Accept it because frankly, you cannot claim that your spouse had not been complaining if your case is like the typical cases that we review daily.

Simply respond with…

“I understand. Let me know if and when you are ready to talk and work on it.”

This is easier said than done but it works like magic.

Step 2 – Listen

Most people have talked their spouse to death of attraction all in the name of communication.

The purpose of listening is not just to hear your spouse out.  It’s a lot more spiritual and deeper than hearing.

In fact, the purpose is to make him or especially her feel heard and safe again.

So for step 2, I want you to listen with an intention to seduce and make him or her feel heard.

I want you to mimic what your spouse is saying back to him or her like this.

“So I am hearing you say, you feel I haven’t been as considerate as I used to be?

Tell me more… Really… wow”

You are effectively investing interest into your partner that they will inevitably return back to you in folds in time.

If your spouse is especially used to you often feeling attacked and defensive, this will create a new and exciting dynamic to make them wonder what is happening.

That’s equivalent to seduction and building attraction back up.

Effective seduction and communication is 80% active listening, 10% ensuring understanding with your words and 10% sharing how you feel.

If your spouse doesn’t feel heard, they are simply not capable of truly hearing how you feel anyway.

I know what you are thinking.

“So my feelings don’t matter?”

Step 3 – Identify Why

TRENDING: 15 Warning Signs Your Wife Doesn’t Love You & How to Attract Her Back ❤️

The worst thing you want to do is get stuck in your feelings and apply too much energy into reacting to your feeling (the symptom) and abandoning the underlying disease right?

We also know that you are in love or obsession because rejection breeds obsession.  This is a scientific fact again.

When a person says to you that they are no longer in love with you, it’s easy to interpret that as the absence of love because it feels like a smack to the face.

This experience can also give you an illusion that you are in love. 

The in-Love experience is more of a “feeling” of affection… even if your spouse is telling you straight up that they hate you.

That is still an expression of passion and evidence of caring… at least about something that involves the both of you.  

What you don’t want is for your spouse to be indifferent.

That will be the true point of no return.

So it is actually natural that a person that may have been with you over a period of time will occasionally fall in and out of love.

How much more if he or she has been complaining of bad experience at any level over a period of time?

If your spouse is a human being like the rest of us, falling out of love is actually very natural especially if they’ve not been feeling heard or significant in your relationship.

It may even have nothing to do with you.

Falling out of love is just how he or she feels “at this moment”. 

Avoid making it a bigger deal than it is.

Instead, assess the data you collected during your listening exercise and focus on identifying the “why” and the role you played in deteriorating the attraction level in your marriage.

Remember, it’s not a matter of FAULT… This is seduction.

I have to share the 2 most important steps with you. 

But note that in the next lesson, I will share more about seduction, effective listening, collecting data and turning them to useful information (a.k.a THE WHY).

So be sure to subscribe and beat up the like button to tell the algorithm that we are giving goodies away over here. 

Thank you so much in advance.

So what else?

Step 4 – Adjust

HAVE YOU SEEN THIS: More Video on our YouTube Channel

You go to a relationship to give; not give and take.  I know you are probably hearing that for the first time but trust me.

Adjusting doesn’t mean that you are succumbing to a lesser role.  It actually means you are “leading” and seducing your spouse back in love with you.

The idea is not to become another person. 

It’s more so about engaging the existing power that you already have in that relationship in a way that benefits the relationship.

What needs to be adjusted is how you show up so that you can attract better love experience and expression.

Step 5 – Patience

It took time to get here. It will take time to get him or her to fall back in love with you.

How long?

It depends on a few factors but what you should focus on is becoming a better self that will attract a better in-love and real love experience.

You can’t afford to pour from an empty cup; you will get burnt out and your partner will unintentionally test you a few times before feeling safe and secure again.

Watch the in-love experience creep back into your relationship slowly but surely.

The Main Lesson

The more engaged in your personal purpose and life mission you are, the easier this process will be.

As we’ve said, this process will be tested.

So spiritual strength, personal purpose and self development are necessary ingredients for smooth recovery from “I don’t love you anymore.”

Watch the next video on the screen for more about that.

5 Signs Your Wife Never Really Loved You

In this lesson, we will be sharing 5 signs your wife never really loved you. 

If you are here right now, it means you are either in doubt or have reached a stumbling wall in your marriage. 

Marriages are often sweet in the beginning… in the in-love moment right?

But once the excitement and fun is over, most people start to feel like they are in a nightmare.

Ever heard of “marriage is not a bed of roses”

What that simply means is there will be highs and lows in your marriage. 

If you meet anyone in life who tells you their marriage is always rosy, they must be perfect and full of shit.

As we all know, no such human exists in this world.

With all that being said, if all you have experienced in your marriage is judgement, abuse and condemnation, here are 5 signs your wife really never loved you.

My name is LOLA and I am the co-author of the book 

GET MY MARRIAGE BACK with my husband OLA

…which you can download for free at www.GetMyMarriageBack.com

Alright this is OLA… 

1st Sign – She Does Not Respect You

Ever heard of a quote that says… 

“When a woman doesn’t respect you, she can’t love you?”

She cannot love at least in the moment in time.

So in recent times, you’ve noticed a few things that come off as disrespectful.

You noticed that your wife puts you down in front of her friends and family and you happen to always be the butt of her jokes.

In fact, she talks about you in a way that almost seems like you disgust her. 

Also, she never lets you get out a thought before she shuts you up and down. 

She just seems like she can’t be bothered by you while she actively complains about everything you do and chastises your every move.

When in argument (which you should be actively avoiding), she is quick to attempt to or put her hands on you. 

I feel your pain; it must hurt.

If this has happened since the beginning, she probably never loved you; but that’s only if it’s been that way from the beginning.

For the most part, it’s never like that from the beginning.  

Something happened at some point and it’s in the best interest of your marriage to find out when because she probably is just not in love with you at the moment.

What’s the next sign?

2nd Sign That She Was Never in Love – Indifference

PREVIOUS POST: Latoya Forever’s 10 Implicit Lessons from the Divorce

Indifference in marriages leads to nowhere but the death of a marriage. 

Marriage requires constant care and effort physically and emotionally. 

If your wife is not interested in what you are doing and she never cares about what you are up to, that’s her being indifferent. 

She doesn’t even acknowledge your presence. 

You can be chatting with the most beautiful woman in the world and she doesn’t care what you say about her.

I know what you are thinking.

“What if she is just being confident and not the jealous type?”

Well I’m sorry to burst your bubble, you are confused because obviously you are here to find some answers right?

Most women are naturally territorial and will protect their marriages if anything feels like encroachment on that territory. 

They are not necessarily trying to own their spouses.  But it’s only natural when a wife is  committed to a marriage enough to want to protect it. 

Studies say most people are not able to come back once indifference sets in. 

If she has always been indifferent, there is a good chance she was never in love with you.

What’s the next sign?

3rd Sign – She Avoids Sex

Sex is an important part of marriage and if its lacking, it makes people cranky. 

There are so many reasons that people end up in sexless marriages such as loss of connection, lack of communication, infidelity, trust issues, low libido and health issues.

Now with all that being said, you feel your situation is different. 

Infact she doesn’t pressure you for sex except when she want to have babies. 

You are probably in deep shit.

When a woman pushes you away when you try to touch her or seems disgusted at the sight of your nakedness, I can respect your concerns.

The worst part for most people experiencing this is when she makes weird excuses like 

“I’m fasting” 

…and she seems to always be on her period.

  • Won’t let you kiss or hold her. 
  • Complains about your hygiene all the time after much effort to clean up. 
  • She visibly stays as far away as possible from you all the time. 

If she has always been this way, she probably was never in love with you.

You see… 

A woman who loves and is in love with her husband will help him in so many ways even when he is falling short. 

She will do her best sexually to let you know she cares for you because it becomes part of how she feels validated. 

Also she will share her thoughts and concerns if something seems inadequate in your intimacy.  

Even if she finds it awkward to say verbally, she will show signs like buying you colognes, body wash, mouthwash, and floss if necessary. 

Your wife who was in love, if ever, would suggest that you both go for regular visits to the gym, dentist and doctor if it comes down to it. 

She would also do all these in a loving way and if you are not oblivious, you will get it. 

My point is that she won’t avoid sex with you if she is in love with you. 

Let’s move on to the next sign…

4th Sign – She Doesn’t Want To Be Seen With You In Public

TRENDING: “My Wife DOESN’T Say I LOVE YOU Back”

Before you start giving excuses that she is an introvert and is too busy with work, can I pause you for a minute? 

Most women love to show off their men,It’s a thing of pride. 

If she is ashamed of being in your presence in public, it’s a red flag. 

So many marriages have broken down to the point where the wife would rather not invite the husband to any outing she goes to. 

When you ask her if you can come, she gets mad and leaves anyway,  

In fact, she is parading herself like a single woman.

What’s the next sign babe?

5th Sign – Future Plans Not Including You

One thing that is common in healthy marriages is that you keep planning on your future together. 

You plan vacations, retirement plans, financial plans and so on together… That’s the expectation of healthy marriages.

A wife who makes major decisions even about the kids without the husband is not only fantasizing about a future without him, she may have already left… spiritually.

As a young girl growing up in a third world country, I heard stories of women who would build a house and not tell their husbands about it. 

I found this to be very strange and I asked my mom why would people keep such secrets from people they claim to love. 

She told me it comes from lack of trust or betrayal from their partners. 

Even though I understood her point, I always thought it was unhealthy to keep such secrets because that is also considered cheating.

If that’s a sign you have experienced, she is not in love with you.

Conclusion & The Main Lesson

HAVE YOU SEEN THIS: More Video on our YouTube Channel

There are probably many more signs we could share with you that would indicate that your wife was never in love with you.

But they all have this one thing in common.

The sign was always noticeable from the beginning of your relationship or your marriage and you are just getting fed up with them now.

Whatever the signs may be… 

If it wasn’t always there, your wife is just not in love at this moment and there is a chance and hope of restoration if you are willing to do the work.

If she outrightly tells you “I was never in love”, have some self respect and start believing her to open yourself up for a better chance at life of bliss and love.

Inside the book GET MY MARRIAGE BACK, we tell our story and how we were able to come back from a filed divorce.

Download it for free at:

www.GetMyMarriageBack.com

You will also see an opportunity to book a coaching session with us.