Stages of Divorce Grief

What are the Stages of Divorce Grief?

The stages of divorce grief are similar to the stages of grief that occur when someone dies.

The stages are shock and disbelief, pain and sorrow, anger and resentment, bargaining and guilt, and acceptance and hope. The order in which the stages occur may vary from person to person.

Some people may skip some of the stages or move through them more quickly than others.

It is important to allow yourself to grieve the loss of your marriage and not try to rush through the process.

1. Shock and disbelief: This is often the first stage after learning that your divorce is final. You may feel numb, have difficulty processing what has happened, and experience many other emotions, including sadness, anger, fear, and relief.

2. Pain and sorrow: As the reality of your divorce sets in, you will likely experience deep feelings of loss and grief.

You may find yourself crying often, feeling depressed, and struggling to cope with the changes in your life.

3. Anger and resentment: It is common to feel a range of negative emotions during this stage, including anger, bitterness, resentment, and frustration. You may lash out at your former spouse, friends, and family members.

4. Bargaining and guilt: During this stage, you may find yourself trying to negotiate with your former spouse or hoping for a reconciliation. You may also feel guilty about the divorce and blame yourself for the situation.

5. Acceptance and hope: In this final stage, you accept that the divorce is final and begin to move on with your life.

You may still feel sad and miss your former spouse, but you are able to start rebuilding your life. You may also feel hopeful about the future and find new meaning in your life.

Tips on Coping with Separation and Divorce

1. Recognize That Your Marriage Is Over: This can be difficult to accept, but it is an important step in the grieving process. Once you come to terms with the fact that your marriage is over, you can begin to move on.

2. Be Patient — Grief Takes Time: The stages of grief do not always happen in a linear fashion. You may move back and forth between stages or even skip some altogether.

3. Surround Yourself With People Who Support You — And Let Them Help: It can be helpful to talk to friends and family members who have gone through a divorce. They can offer guidance and support.

4. Practice Excellent Self-Care: During this difficult time, it is important to take care of yourself both physically and emotionally. Make sure to eat healthy foods, get enough sleep, and exercise regularly.

5. Feel Your Feelings: It is normal to feel a range of emotions after your divorce. Allow yourself to grieve the loss of your marriage.

6. Find Out What’s There Besides Anger, Sadness, And Fear: As you move through the grieving process, you may find that you have new insights about yourself and your life. Allow yourself to explore these new perspectives.

7. Timebox Your Grief: Set aside specific times each day to grieve the loss of your marriage. This can help you to avoid becoming overwhelmed by your emotions.

8. Don’t Hide Your Divorce Grief From Your Kids (But Don’t Freak Them Out, Either)

It is important, to be honest with your children about your divorce. However, you should avoid sharing too much information or putting them in the middle of the situation.

9. Write It Out, Work It Out, Or Just plain Talk It Out: Journaling, therapy, and talking to friends and family members can all be helpful ways to cope with your divorce.

10. Stop Blaming Your Ex and Start Forgiving Them (and Yourself) One of the most important things you can do for yourself is to let go of any resentment and blame you may feel. This can be difficult, but it is an essential part of healing.

11. Remember: You Will Still Be a Part of Your Kid’s Life Even After Divorce Although your family may be changing, you will still be an important part of your children’s lives. Try to maintain a positive relationship with your former spouse for the sake of your kids.

12. Consider Professional Help Many people find it helpful to seek out professional help during the divorce process. A therapist can provide support and guidance as you navigate this difficult time.

If you are facing divorce, it is important to understand the grieving process. By recognizing the stages of grief, you can better prepare yourself for the journey ahead.

Remember, every divorce is unique and there is no right or wrong way to grieve. If you find yourself struggling, don’t hesitate to seek out professional help. With time and patience, you will eventually reach the acceptance and hope stage.

Don’t Suppress Your Feelings While Grieving

Everyone is different and everyone can experience each one of these stages very differently. Allowing yourself the freedom to grieve during a divorce doesn’t make you weak.  In fact, it can actually make you stronger. If you try to bottle up your emotions, they may eventually come out in destructive ways. It’s okay to cry, be angry, and feel sad. These are all normal reactions to loss.

Divorce is a process, not an event. Just as there is no one right way to grieve the death of a loved one, there is no one right way to grieve the loss of a marriage. Allow yourself the time and space to experience all the emotions that come with this major life change. Seek out support from friends and family members, or consider professional help if you need it. With time and patience, you will eventually reach the acceptance and hope stage.

Coping With the Hard Feelings

Coping with grief during a divorce is exceedingly difficult. Feeling all the emotions mentioned in each stage during the process of divorce is common and necessary for moving forward. It is important to surround yourself with people that love you and support you to help you through this painful time. If you are feeling lost, consider professional counseling to help you regain a sense of self and hope for the future.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Signs That Your Husband is Cheating

Ladies, few things in life feel worse than the nagging suspicion that your husband is cheating on you………other than to find out that’s actually the case.

There are a ton of little telltale signs that you may be able to spot that will start your womanly radar ticking.

Some of your man’s actions may end up being innocent enough, but at other times, where there’s smoke, there could be infidelity fire.

Cheating can be in the mind only, purely emotional, or physical, or a combination of all three.

Just like every marriage is different, so too is every case of cheating.

We won’t quote statistics, but studies show that a lot of men (and women for that matter) do contemplate cheating in some way at some point. It’s one way to explain why the nation’s divorce rate currently hovers at around 50 percent.

So, no matter what your degree of suspicion is when it comes to your husband and what’s in his mind, there are a number of things to keep an eye out for.

Don’t take them as gospel by themselves that cheating is going on, but if you see a lot of what follows in your marriage, it may be time for the “we need to talk” intervention.

Frustration in the marriage is one common trigger; the cheater may make several attempts to solve problems to no avail.

Maybe they had second thoughts about getting married or they were jealous over the attention given to a new baby and neither had the skill set to communicate these feelings.

Perhaps the straying spouse has childhood baggage — neglect, abuse, or a parent who cheated — that interferes with his or her ability to maintain a committed relationship.

Less often, the cheater doesn’t value monogamy, lacks empathy, or simply doesn’t care about the consequences.

We will take a look at a number of risk factors and causes for cheating, but it’s important to point out upfront that a partner doesn’t cause their spouse to cheat. Whether it was a cry for help, an exit strategy, or a means to get revenge after being cheated on themselves, the cheater alone is responsible for cheating.

1. He’s suddenly very interested in his appearance.

If your husband was previously indifferent to his appearance and is now spending more time than usual on his hair and clothes, it could be a sign that he’s trying to impress someone else.

He may also be working out more, or paying more attention to his grooming habits in general.

2. He’s working longer hours or taking more business trips.

If your husband’s work schedule has suddenly changed and he’s spending more time at the office or going on more business trips, it could be a sign that he’s cheating.

He may be using work as an excuse to meet someone else or to spend time away from home.

3. He’s become more distant and withdrawn.

If your husband is suddenly acting distant and withdrawn, it could be a sign that he’s cheating.

He may be less interested in talking to you or spending time with you. He may also seem preoccupied and distracted when you are together.

he’s cheating. He may be buying gifts for someone else, or he may be paying for activities that he wouldn’t normally spend money on.

4. He’s being secretive and evasive.

If your husband is being secretive and evasive, it could be a sign that he’s cheating.

He may be hiding his phone or computer from you, or deleting texts and emails without reading them.

He may also be reluctant to share information about his whereabouts or who he’s been spending time with.

5. He’s got a new group of friends.

If your husband has suddenly started hanging out with a new group of friends, it could be a sign that he’s cheating.

He may be spending more time with them than with you, or he may be secretive about who they are and what they do together.

6. He’s acting differently around you.

If your husband is acting differently around you, it could be a sign that he’s cheating.

He may be more critical of you, or he may be more distant and withdrawn.

He may also seem more interested in sex, or he may be less interested in sex.

7. He’s spending more money than usual.

If your husband is spending more money than usual, it could be a sign that he’s cheating.

He may be buying gifts for someone else, or he may be paying for activities that he wouldn’t normally spend money on.

8. What are those charges on the credit card?

If you monitor your monthly credit card statements and you start to see things pop up that you don’t recognize, they may be harmless, or they could be signs of monkey business that’s afoot.

If you can’t match up the expense with the story, that’s a problem. Also, if he’s now paying in cash for things that used to be charged, that’s a money monkey business concern as well.

9. He wants you to stop doing nice things for him.

Sometimes known as the Catholic guilt syndrome. If you’re being kind and considerate, as relationships should be, it could be revving up the conflict in him if he’s thinking about cheating or already doing so.

10. Cheat on me once, shame on you. Cheat on me twice, shame on me.

A spouse who has cheated in the past and gotten caught is more likely to think they can get away by doing a better job of cheating the second time around. If your spouse has a history of cheating, and you suspect cheating is happening again, it may be time to make that spouse a part of your history instead.

Why Do Husbands Cheat?

There are a lot of reasons that husbands cheat on their wives. Sometimes it has to do with the husband’s own insecurities or feeling like he isn’t good enough for his wife.

Sometimes cheating is a way to get revenge after an argument or disagreement. And sometimes, husbands cheat simply because they’re curious or they want to experience something new.

The Ultimate Marriage Quiz

Welcome to the Ultimate Marriage Quiz where you will be able to assess your marriage for survival

… or becoming the dreaded 50% divorce-rate statistics.

Start the Marriage Quiz Here...

My marriage is bleeding towards divorce very fast and all our attempt to communicate end up in argument.
I don’t feel free with expressing myself and my feelings with my spouse.
My marriage brings pain to my soul very deeply and I have never had to face this level of challenge in my life.
On a scale of 1-10, my attraction level towards my spouse is...
I believe that my spouse is the chosen one for me and my soulmate. I don’t see myself with another person in the future.
My biggest fear is losing my spouse. So I will do anything to save our marriage.
My spouse has fallen out of love and I feel hopeless because I don’t think our marriage can survive without us both in love
Based on my experience, I don’t feel that love is enough now... at least not anymore.
My marriage comes before my career life and/or business. But career is not functioning at full potential right now.
My spouse is selfish, doesn’t care and I feel like our marriage will crash the very moment I stop putting in any effort.
As a communicator, I feel like my spouse is a poor communicator and it has led our marriage down this path.
I feel like I don’t have my own space when it comes to this marriage.
If my spouse and I get locked in a room with nothing to worry about, we will hump (have sex with) each other like rabbits for at least 15 minutes.
I am confident in my ability to save our marriage all by myself.
Our present decision making process as a couple does not involve or reflect my personal desires.
I tend to put my spouse’s desire above mine.
We have so many good times and memories in our time together and in our marriage.
I fantasize quite often about life without my spouse.
I treat my spouse like royalty.
We fight so much that I can’t fight no more.
I think my partner is a good person.
I try to help my spouse with constructive corrections.
I let go and forgive super-easily.
My spouse is very mean with words and it hurts like hell.
We have sex at least 2-3 times per week.
I get very sarcastic with my spouse so that my point cuts across when we argue or disagree.
I look forward to coming home to my spouse when I am out.
My partner rolls eyes indicating that what I have to say is garbage even before I say the first word.
I love myself more than I love my partner.
I am afraid of speaking my mind because I know it will get me no-where.
I have other friends I feel more emotionally connected to than my spouse.
My spouse and I still go out on dates.
My spouse is not happy unless he/she controls every situation and conversation.
My spouse thinks I over-react and is oblivious to the fact that we have serious issues.
My partner threatens me with divorce and use ultimatums to manipulate me.
I think I want divorce but I am scared of moving on despite the fact that I already gave up on talking because it only ends up in argument.
My partners utters rude remarks at every attempt to communicate.
My partner is very selfish and consistently complain about nothing.
On a scale of 1-10, my partner’s attraction level towards me is...
My partner is attached to me in a toxic way and I feel smothered.
I am no longer attracted to my partner and I am not sure if I want to save my marriage.
I have fallen out of love and I feel there is no hope because it isn’t fair to hold my partner hostage in a marriage without love.
I love my partner so much and I wonder why the marriage is suffering.
My partner puts the career life and/or business over our marriage.
I am selfish right now, could careless and I don’t feel like I have the strength to put in further effort in saving our marriage.
My partner is arrogant and acts like my parents and that has to lead our marriage down this toxic path.
My partner is asking for space.
If my spouse and I get locked in a room with nothing to worry about, we will not be comfortable looking at each other in the eyes because attraction is dried up.
I am not confident in my ability to save our marriage by myself.
Our present decision-making process as a couple involve or reflect my personal desires.
My partner always put personal desires above the greater good for both of us.
Our experience together in this marriage is full of toxic memories.
I think my partner is fantasizing quite often about life with someone else.
My partner treats me like royalty.
My partner is a snob.
I think my partner is a nobody without me.
My partner acts like a know-it-all.
I am not sure that I can forgive my partner... may be I can forgive but I will never forget.
Sometimes, I say things that I don’t necessarily mean out of anger to my partner.
We have sex at most once per month.
My partner get very sarcastic with me when we argue or disagree.
My partner look forward to coming home to me.
I can pretty much predict that my partner will only say nonsense to me even before a word is said.
My partner is afraid of speaking his/her mind and that gets us no-where.
My partner has other friends or family he/she is more emotionally connected to than me.
My spouse and I have not gone on a proper date in a while.
I am not happy because my partner’s ideas do not make sense and I can’t fix things the way I want them.
I think my partner over-reacts and when, in fact, our issues are no big deal... they are simply blown out of proportion.
After making enough effort with no rewards, I will have to file divorce because it makes no sense to be living like this
I am tired of fighting for this marriage.
Complete the form below to see results

ultimate marriage quiz

What is the Marriage Quiz?

The ultimate marriage quiz is designed to help you identify where your marriage is presently;

..in terms of its chance to survive or crash.

As a matter of fact, your marriage has a 50% chance of surviving based on the statistics that we all know across different societies.

So the marriage quiz is an assessment that is quite necessary for most married people to take in order to assess health of their marriage.

The Problem with Marriages Today that this Marriage Quiz Addresses

While it is true that …

Marriage is an institution… Recognized around the world as a unit structure for family and society…

It presents unique sets of challenges for both husbands and wives even with a decent level of intelligence and knowledge.

The reason is that intelligence, semantics, dictionary meanings and common sense tend to have limitations

…around only things you can see, hear and smell.

In fact, your intelligence and “everything you believe in” will be tested…

And you will (at least initially) lose yourself at some point.

This One Factor is Responsible for 80% of the Energy that Creates a Healthy or Toxic Marriage.

When dealing with another human being such as your wife or husband, you are responsible (unfortunately) for how they “feel.”

Your partner may not express his or her feelings in a way that your eyes, ears and nose can perceive or sense.

You are still responsible simply because you (as an adult) made a choice to commit to them.

So the only solution when it comes to marriage is to master your partner from an emotional stand point.

But it starts with mastering your emotions as a reference point before you can even remotely come close…

To understanding another human being emotionally.

The 1st Marriage Quiz or Assessment that we Used!

At the 9 years mark, our marriage hit a wall and we had to do something about it; one person ran for the hills and the other shut off.

Pick up the book GET MY MARRIAGE BACK and read it 10-15 times to find out who ran away and how.

As you can imagine, none of these 2 strategies or temperament-show-out was the healthy choice.

But thank goodness, one of us found the way to the 5 love languages assessment which we found through the actual book.

And to say the least, it was an eye opener.

Who is this Marriage Quiz for?

This marriage quiz is designed for individuals to assess the health of his or her marriage.

And not necessarily to master the love language.

Because there is a good chance that you already feel like your marriage is in a bad place.

That’s what this intensive and comprehensive marriage quiz is all about.

It’s for marriages in potential crisis already and your first test is your patience level to complete the assessment.

Peep What People are Saying About the Ultimate Marriage Quiz

“I knew it was abnormal for me to cry to bed every night but I also felt tremendous guilt for feeling like I should throw my marriage away.”
~ Claire Moss

“This quiz was the starting point of the redemption of my marriage.
It became extremely easy for me to heal and attract her back once I took the assessment. Good stuff.”
~ Jim Morales

“Wow. My instant results gave me so much clarity and insights that no one in my circle was able to help me identify.
I needed this because frankly our marriage was drowning fast.”
~ Kendra Morrison

Success Stories & Testimonials

How to Use the Ultimate Marriage Quiz to Assess Your Marriage

The ultimate marriage quiz is absolutely free.

And it contains 70 questions for you to answer and/or acknowledge to the best of your knowledge of your situation.

But you can only see 7 questions per page; making the module a total of 10 interactive pages.

So as soon as you complete the last question on each page, it will automatically load the next 7 questions into the page.

The questions are mostly ‘agree/disagree’ type questions

…with 2 ‘scale of 1-10’ questions designed to be friendly and interactive.

Here is my Guarantee if you Use this Marriage Quiz to Assess the Health of your Relationship

There is no guarantee in life especially marriage even if you are a perfect person based on most people’s assessment.

So should you give it all up?

Of course not.

And that’s why we created this marriage quiz; it’s precisely…

Because we know that most people approach marriage with leaning on their own understanding and “righteousness”.

Why you would Skip the Quiz

The quiz could be skipped if,

  • You are in a perfect marriage or…
  • You are not in a perfect marriage but you haven’t felt enough pain that you can relate to your marriage.

Either way, it is understandable.

And we can just hope that you have the tools to handle the inevitable crisis and conflict that test all marriages.

Why You Should Get Started Now!

Just by reading the question of this marriage quiz…

You will already gain tons of insights that you can apply immediately towards a healthy marriage.

It’s the best thing you can do in order to attract a healthy marriage and love from day to day and for the rest of your life.

Click Here to Start the Marriage Quiz Now!

What are the signs of a failing marriage?

The best way to find out is to pay attention to the question of LOLA & OLA’s ultimate marriage quiz.

What are good marriage questions?

We have create 70 questions to assess the health of your marriage.

It’s called the ultimate marriage quiz.

How well do you know your spouse questions?

When you take LOLA & OLA’s ultimate marriage quiz to assess your marriage, you will extract some great insights about your spouse.

Sexless Marriage Quiz

START THE QUIZ NOW BELOW

Are you in a Sexless Marriage? [QUIZ]

I do not initiate sex with my partner.
I do not initiate sex at least 50% of the time with my partner.
I would not like to initiate sex more times with my partners.
My partner does not initiate sex with me.
My partner does not initiate sex at least 50% of the time with me.
I would like my partner to initiate sex more times with me.
My partner and I have not had sex at least once in the last 3 months.
My partner and I have not had sex at least twice in the last 1 week.
There is a medical condition that hurts our intimacy level.
I am sexually frustrated in this relationship.
Complete the form below to see results

Pick the answer that is most suitable to your situation… Agree/Disagree and Click continue to next question.

In 2 minutes or less, you can use this quiz as a tool, not only to detect if you are in a sexless marriage….

But also to get a quick recommendation to live a blissful, intimate and sexually fulfilled married life.

Sexless Marriage Quiz

Here is a full article on The chances of survival in a sexless marriage

And Here is a free audio book on how we used attraction secrets to break the chains of sexless-ness in our marriage.

Some studies have revealed that about 15-20% of married couples live in the sexually frustrated marriage.

This reality can create a hostile environment where one or both will find themselves living a dangerous life.

It could manifest mentally or….

One or both could start seeking satisfaction from multiple partners which can create exposure to diseases and many other things.

So it is very important to scroll to the top…

And use the 2 minutes sexless marriage quiz too find out if your present arrangement is considered a sexless marriage.

If you let it linger, it can last forever and that’s just how low of a quality lifestyle you will have to endure.

The truth is that there is science, and of course an art, to why you may be going to the drought in your marriage.

That is to say there is a solution even if the underlying issues are medical related.

But you don’t know what you don’t know and can’t fix it until to know.

There is nothing better than finding yourself in a marriage where you feel sexually satisfied…

And are also authentically happy to stay faithful.

Even if there is a slow down, you know exactly what to do to spice things up either as a man or a woman.

That is an empowered marriage.


Are you STRUGGLING in your... MARRIAGE OR RELATIONSHIP?

Are you having a difficult time getting your spouse or the person you love on the same page?

Is your dream to build a happily ever after life heading down the drains?

I know...

The harsh reality is that the happiness in your marriage may be over...

IT'S BROKEN...

"Can it be saved?"

...And maybe you still even live in the house with your spouse as roommates, barely any sex or intimacy and probably in denial.

I get it.

You wonder...

"Is that the inevitable supposed and purposed end for marriages?"

You know you didn't bargain for such a painful experience.

In this FREE Book "GET MY MARRIAGE BACK", you will discover the UNCOMMON secrets of...

HOW TO SAVE & FIX YOUR BROKEN MARRIAGE ALL BY YOURSELF EVEN WHEN THERE IS INFIDELITY OR YOU FEEL IT IS COMPLETELY OVER.

There’s nothing worse than being in a marriage you thought was ordained by God and feeling like you are in eternal bondage and it seems there will never be an end.

It feels very dark in your matrimonial home and you can’t even share your ordeal with anyone.

You try so many moves to save your marriage but your spouse just doesn’t care anymore;

...you feel as though he/she is no more the person you married.

Finally, you thought may be you should communicate more

But the very act of communication digs deeper and deeper holes of arguments, fights, emotional aches and more.

Exhausted, you share your experience with your family and now the whole family is in feud;

Your parents, siblings, on both sides of the family etc.

They have all caught feelings.

You wonder if your kids will have a home with both parents 6 months from now... it feels like no one cares or ever cared.

If you feel a connection to this reality at any level, I feel your pain.

We know what that feels like.

Inside this book, you will discover our full story from being madly in love to a completely destroyed marriage; DIVORCE and back together stronger.

Whatever "destroyed marriage" means in your imagination, we've been through it and it was basically impossible to fix our marriage.

We didn't fix it.

Get My Marriage BackWe created a brand new, better and stronger marriage empire on 3 pillars that you will discover in...

"GET MY MARRIAGE BACK."

May be your situation is not bad at all, every marriage will go through crisis as a test to take you to greatness.

This book will prepare you for it when it comes.

If you feel like your home is heading in a very bad direction, you can't stop arguing, you can't speak your mind etc... you need all 3 sections of this book.

  1. Emergency
  2. New Foundation
  3. Real Love Techniques

It's time for you to build that real love experience (that you bargained for when you got married to your spouse)

...from a very intentional and deliberate stand point.

Marriage is not a partnership and it's takes more than common sense.

I'm sure you are a smart person because you found your way here.

But clearly, your smartness and common sense hasn't worked out well in your marriage.

The secrets we share with you in this book work both in the ancient and even better in the civilized age.

What percent of sexless marriages end in divorce?

About 20% of marriages are sexless and about 50% of them end up in divorce. Lack of sex is definitely a contributing factor to divorce rate.

What is considered a sexless marriage?

It varies from marriage to marriage but once it become a regular thing to go 3 months without sex, you should be concerned and seek help,

How long do sexless marriages last?

Sexless marriages can last as long as the couple wants it to last with respect actions. If you are willing to stay even if you don’t like it, it can last a lifetime.

Can a sexless marriage work?

It depends on what the root cause is. There are many sexless marriages that last when its caused by medical issues. Also, many last but not necessarily without affairs and transgressions.