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In this lesson, you will discover how to deal with a disrespectful wife without losing any further respect in your marriage.
A few months ago, David reached out to us complaining bitterly about his marital life,
…and how it has probably been the worst decision he made to marry her.
When we asked him what his number one struggle was, he shared with us that his wife just doesn’t know how to respect a man.
He went on to share with us how he felt that she learned the behavior from her mother.
According to him, he had tried to teach her to see how she can make him feel more like a man in how she talks and utters consistent rude remarks.
I said to him, “No Wonder”.
He asked me “What do you mean?”
Then I said, to him, “In listening to you, I have 5 steps you’ve taken that made your wife lose respect for you”
And I went on to share the opposite of the following 5 steps we want to share with you with him.
My name is LOLA and I am the co-author of the book
GET MY MARRIAGE BACK with my husband OLA
…which you can download for free at www.GetMyMarriageBack.com
This is OLA…
Step #1 – Stop Asking for Respect
If you have to ask for respect, there is a good chance that you do not deserve respect.
And if you did deserve respect, that doesn’t guarantee that you will receive respect from you wife… and let me guess….
That makes life unfair… right?
Welcome to the real world where everyone will be tested especially people or entities that occupy any position of leadership in any capacity.
If you didn’t know this already, that’s evidence that you probably haven’t earned the respect you are looking for.
Respect is earned.
Respect is not a right because you are a husband and respect is not an obligation on the part of your wife;
at the minimum, that’s not the reality.
You may have learned that it’s a wife’s duty from some type of religious belief system,
but that’s precisely the cause of many suffering in marriage; unrealistic expectations.
So stop asking for respect and learn how to attract respect.
Inside the book GET MY MARRIAGE BACK,
we tell our story and how we were able to come back from a filed divorce stronger even after all respect was lost.
Download it for free at: www.GetMyMarriageBack.com
You will also see an opportunity to book a coaching session with us.
Step #2 – Engage Infinite Patience
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In a marriage, your wife will test you consistently and not necessarily deliberately.
People like David will quite often ask us how long they should be patient for before they start complaining and nagging about lack of respect.
The only answer to that is forever. And again, I know that seems unfair to the typical person because it doesn’t make common sense.
If that doesn’t make any common sense,
it would also mean that you are not making any common sense making a choice to stay married to your wife.
So to realistically prepare for the inevitable and consistent test of your temperament,
you will have to give and invest infinite patience into the marriage.
I acknowledge that this is extremely hard when you also don’t engage your power of choice that was made to be with your wife.
When you feel like a victim, marriage dynamics will continue to come off as unfair.
In love and war, all is fair.
Step #3 – Focus on Giving
How often have you heard “marriage is all about give and take?”
This is a terrible philosophy that only works in business transaction type of relationships and that’s why marriages are failing left and right.
The best way to leverage a relationship is to go there and focus on giving and nothing else; isn’t it the best way to harvest big time when harvest season comes?
Even in business, you learn to invest lots of time in networking with no clear sight on profits always within reach.
In fact, David is one of those guys who is practising worse than give and take; he is more so thinking of respect as a duty on his wife’s part and his right.
As you can probably see now, that’s a problematic way of approaching a romantic relationship especially if some events have made her lose the respect for you.
By focusing on giving, you are honoring the fact that respect is earned and it will come back in due time because you reap what you sow especially with a typical wife.
On the next video, you will discover how give and take is the worst belief system you can adopt into your marriage ever.
So be sure to do everything in your power such as smashing anything that looks like any part of a hand, fingers, or color red around this video…
To make sure you are notified and see that video.
Step #4 – Avoid Keeping Scores With Your Wife
TRENDING: 5 Signs Your Wife DOESN’T RESPECT YOU
David’s complaint also included the fact that they argued almost every other day in a very toxic way; in fact, every conversation leads to argument.
A man who understands women does not argue with women.
I know what you are thinking.
“What’s wrong with a harmless and healthy debate?”
We know from studies that no one wins an argument and an argument is an active competition to be right… right?
There is a 50% chance that you will win and be right but you will also have a little resentment built against you because your wife now feels a little less than.
You are probably also thinking…
“How is it possible to not ever argue?”
Well… we recommend to avoid argument because it is only natural to end up in argument sometimes.
But you are better positioned to recognize toxic vibes and energy with this knowledge you just acquired.
So avoid arguments without coming off as dismissive or a snob with your wife. Instead, lean in and listen actively to understand her view points.
Even if it doesn’t make sense in the moment, assume that it is probably a blind spot for you in the moment at least until she realizes she was wrong.
That can also be “never” and you have to give the freedom for that to be okay to enjoy a romantic relationship especially in a marriage.
Step #5 – Engage Self Development
Without consistent and perpetual self-development, all of steps 1-4 will be extremely hard because you would be pouring from an empty cup.
But if you are well equipped, you don’t need validation or to feel like you are right even when you are so sure that you are right.
It will lead to a strong sense of security, healthy self-esteem, strong mental state and in due time you will attract the healthy love and life that you deserve and desire.
Conclusion & Main Lesson
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Respect is earned.
That also means, when you don’t know each other enough and when you haven’t been tested in some form of crisis, it can seem like your wife is respecting you.
Eventually at some point, you will need to earn real respect and that will happen as a function of time, a level of pain and crisis.
Then it can last and become real love.
See this video on the screen to learn all about that.