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“Does My Wife MISS ME During SEPARATION?”

Living apart from your spouse is an agonizing experience, leading many hurting husbands to constantly ask: does my wife miss me during separation?

When communication drops, it is incredibly easy to spiral into panic, over-analyze her silence, or look for hidden clues in her text messages.

However, chasing her for validation will only backfire.

True attraction requires emotional breathing room.

This guide outlines the psychological reality of marital distance, how to identify genuine positive signs during separation, and how to use this season to build your own self-respect so she naturally wonders about you again.

does my wife miss me during separation

Does My Wife Miss Me During Separation?

The short answer is: probably yes, at least sometimes—but that doesn’t automatically mean she is ready to reconcile.

Human beings become emotionally attached to routines, shared experiences, companionship, and familiarity.

Even when a marriage is struggling, the absence of a spouse often creates emotional gaps that are impossible to ignore.

However, whether your wife misses you—and how intensely she misses you—depends on several factors:

  • Who initiated the separation
  • The level of emotional damage in the marriage
  • Whether trust was broken
  • How long the separation has lasted
  • Whether she feels relief or loss
  • The quality of your interactions before separation

Many husbands assume that if their wife isn’t reaching out, she doesn’t care anymore.

That assumption is often wrong.

People process emotional pain differently. Some become more expressive. Others become quieter.

A wife can miss you and still choose distance because she believes space is necessary.

The Law of Attraction: Why Chasing Her Kills Her Desire to Wonder

When you are separated, hyper-fixing on whether your wife misses you is the fastest way to ensure that she doesn’t.

If you are constantly seeking signs of her attraction, it consumes your thoughts, causing you to completely neglect your personal growth and life goals.

Your relationship shouldn’t define you; it should complement your authentic self.

In life, people often attract what they fear most because fear changes behavior.

The husband who fears losing his wife becomes needy, reactive, impatient, and emotionally dependent.

Ironically, these are the exact traits that reduce attraction.

If a man hasn’t given his wife space, she cannot experience the psychological vacuum required to actually miss him.

Start paying attention to:

  • Your physical fitness
  • Your emotional intelligence
  • Your purpose and mission
  • Your friendships
  • Your faith and gratitude
  • Your personal growth

Allow your wife room to wonder what you are doing.

Allow her room to experience your absence.

Taking your attention off her and investing it back into your life’s purpose is often the fastest way to rebuild attraction during separation.

Why Separation Isn't Always a Bad Thing - does my wife miss me during separation

Why Separation Isn’t Always a Bad Thing

Most men hear the word “separation” and immediately think the marriage is over.

Not necessarily.

In many cases, separation is simply a symptom of emotional overwhelm.

Think about the alternative.

Would you rather continue living in a toxic environment filled with:

  • Constant conflict
  • Emotional disconnection
  • Resentment
  • Criticism
  • Contempt
  • Exhaustion

Sometimes separation creates the emotional breathing room necessary for clarity.

Distance often reveals things that proximity hides.

When two people stop reacting to each other daily, they gain perspective.

That perspective can either confirm the desire to leave—or reignite appreciation for what was taken for granted.

Is It Normal to Lose Attraction to Your Partner? What to Do Next

5 Positive Signs During Separation

If you’re wondering whether your wife misses you, look for behaviors rather than assumptions.

Sign #1 – She Reaches Out Without Necessity

When communication is no longer required but she still finds reasons to contact you, it can indicate emotional attachment remains.

Examples include:

  • Asking how you’re doing
  • Sending funny videos
  • Sharing life updates
  • Checking in casually

These interactions suggest she still values connection.

Sign #2 – She Brings Up Positive Memories

Nostalgia is powerful.

When your wife references vacations, family moments, inside jokes, or good times together, she’s mentally revisiting emotional experiences associated with you.

That is usually a positive sign.

Sign #3 – She Delays Permanent Decisions

A wife who is absolutely certain she wants out typically moves forward decisively.

If she continues postponing divorce discussions, asking for more time, or expressing uncertainty, she may still be processing her feelings.

Sign #4 – She Shows Curiosity About Your Life

People don’t become curious about things they no longer care about.

If she’s asking mutual friends about you, monitoring your progress, or asking questions about what you’ve been doing, there is likely still emotional interest.

Sign #5 – She Becomes More Comfortable Around You

Watch her energy rather than her words.

If interactions become warmer, more relaxed, and less defensive over time, attraction and trust may slowly be rebuilding.

3 Bad Signs During Separation From Husband

While maintaining hope is healthy, it’s equally important to stay grounded in reality.

Bad Sign #1 – She Shows Complete Indifference

Anger still contains emotional energy.

Indifference often signals emotional detachment.

If she consistently appears uninterested in your life, your well-being, or the future of the marriage, that’s a concern.

Bad Sign #2 – She Actively Avoids Contact

If she repeatedly refuses communication, avoids all interaction, and demonstrates no desire to maintain connection, she may be creating emotional distance intentionally.

Bad Sign #3 – She Is Focused Entirely on a Future Without You

Pay attention to actions rather than promises.

If she is making long-term plans that exclude you entirely and shows no interest in discussing reconciliation, that’s a sign the separation may be moving toward permanence.

Check this out: How To Rebuild Trust After An Affair

3 Ways To Make Your Wife Miss You During Separation

Many husbands ask, “How do I make my wife miss me during separation?”

The answer is not manipulation.

You cannot force somebody to miss you.

You can only create conditions where missing you becomes possible.

#1 – Stop Being Available Every Minute

Constant texting, calling, checking in, and seeking reassurance destroys mystery.

Attraction requires space.

Space creates curiosity.

Curiosity creates emotional movement.

#2 – Rebuild Your Identity

One of the biggest mistakes separated spouses make is allowing the marriage to become their entire identity.

Become the man she originally admired:

  • Purpose-driven
  • Confident
  • Emotionally grounded
  • Self-respecting
  • Growth-oriented

Your relationship should complement your life, not become your life.

#3 – Master Emotional Intelligence

Most marital breakdowns are not caused by evil intentions.

They’re caused by poor emotional management.

Learn to eliminate behaviors that poison relationships:

  • Blame
  • Shaming
  • Condemnation
  • Sarcasm
  • Constant criticism
  • Defensiveness

A calm and emotionally intelligent man naturally becomes more attractive.

Focus on the Three P’s

When navigating separation, remember:

Prayer

For things beyond your control.

Patience

Because emotional healing takes time.

Process

Because sustainable reconciliation is a journey, not an event.

does my wife miss me during separation - Make Your Wife Miss You During Separation by Becoming More Attractive

Make Your Wife Miss You During Separation by Becoming More Attractive

Attraction isn’t built through pressure.

It’s built through contrast.

If your wife remembers a stressed, reactive, needy version of you, then your mission is not convincing her to return.

Your mission is becoming a healthier version of yourself.

Work on:

  • Physical health
  • Emotional stability
  • Leadership
  • Self-awareness
  • Gratitude
  • Purpose

The more grounded you become, the more likely she is to notice the difference.

Whether reconciliation happens or not, you win because you become stronger.

Keeping Hope During Separation Without Becoming Desperate

Hope is healthy.

Desperation is not.

The difference is subtle.

Hope says:

“I want this marriage to work, but I’ll be okay regardless.”

Desperation says:

“My happiness depends entirely on her decision.”

The first mindset creates attraction.

The second creates pressure.

Remember that respect, trust, and attraction are rebuilt gradually.

Trying to force outcomes usually delays them.

So… Does My Wife Miss Me During Separation?

In most cases, yes, your wife likely misses aspects of you during separation.

She may miss your companionship, your presence, your support, your humor, your family routines, or the life you built together.

But the better question isn’t whether she misses you.

The better question is:

Are you becoming the kind of man she can miss even more tomorrow than she does today?

Give her space.

Focus on growth.

Stay emotionally grounded.

Let attraction rebuild naturally rather than trying to force it.

Sometimes the strongest move during separation is not chasing harder—it’s becoming better.

Check this out: The signs that your wife is ready to reconcile

Frequently Asked Questions [FAQ]

What to expect during separation?

Expect a mixture of emotions including sadness, relief, confusion, hope, and uncertainty. Separation often creates emotional distance initially, but it can also provide clarity and perspective for both spouses over time.

What percentage of marriages last after a separation?

Research varies, but many separated couples never formally divorce, and a meaningful percentage eventually reconcile. Success depends heavily on the reasons for separation, willingness to change, and both partners’ commitment to rebuilding trust.

How long do divorced couples still sleep together?

There is no standard timeline because every situation is unique. Some couples maintain physical intimacy during separation or after divorce due to emotional attachment, while others stop immediately once the relationship ends.

What should a wife not do during separation?

A wife should avoid using separation solely as a tool for punishment, manipulation, or emotional leverage. Clear boundaries, honest communication, and respect for the agreed purpose of the separation create the best environment for healing and clarity.

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3 Signs My SEPARATED WIFE Wants to RECONCILE

If you’re searching for signs your wife wants to reconcile after separation, you’re probably looking for reassurance that your marriage still has a chance.

Maybe you’ve been asking yourself:

  • What is my wife thinking during separation?
  • Are there any positive signs during separation?
  • Are there signs my separated wife wants to reconcile?
  • Or am I missing signs your wife doesn’t want to reconcile?

These are natural questions.

When a marriage is in limbo, it’s easy to analyze every text, every conversation, and every interaction looking for clues. But before we discuss the biggest signs your wife wants to reconcile, there are a few important things you need to understand.

In many cases, the way you handle separation has a direct impact on whether you see more positive signs during separation or more signs your wife doesn’t want to reconcile.

Let’s start with the foundation.

signs my separated wife wants to reconcile

When to Give Up On Separation 💔 Average Length & Rebuilding Attraction

Every Separation Is Different

One reason people misread signs their wife wants to reconcile is because they compare their situation to someone else’s.

The reality is that every marriage has a unique history, unique challenges, and unique circumstances.

What may be one of the signs your separated spouse wants to reconcile in one marriage may not mean exactly the same thing in another.

That’s why you should be careful about relying on generic advice without considering your specific situation.

The goal is not to compare your journey to someone else’s. The goal is to understand what’s happening in your marriage and respond accordingly.

Don’t Become Obsessed With Looking for Signs

Ironically, people searching for signs wife wants to reconcile often become so focused on finding signs that they lose sight of what really matters.

They analyze every message.

They overthink every interaction.

They spend hours wondering what their spouse meant by a particular comment.

The problem is that obsession rarely creates clarity.

In fact, it often creates anxiety, fear, and behaviors that can push a spouse further away.

Rather than spending every day looking for signs your wife misses you during separation, focus on becoming the strongest version of yourself.

That mindset creates better outcomes than constant analysis ever will.

What Is My Wife Thinking During Separation?

This is one of the most common questions husbands ask.

The truth is that nobody can fully know what your wife is thinking during separation except your wife.

However, one thing is generally true: separation creates space for reflection.

Your wife may be evaluating the relationship.

She may be considering what worked and what didn’t.

She may be thinking about the future.

She may be comparing life with and without the marriage.

This is exactly why giving healthy space is so important.

When someone feels free to think clearly, they often gain perspective they couldn’t access while caught in the daily conflicts that led to the separation.

Why Giving Space Creates More Positive Signs During Separation

Many husbands make the mistake of believing that more contact automatically improves their chances of reconciliation.

That’s not always true.

Sometimes the most productive thing you can do is create room for both people to breathe.

Healthy space allows emotions to settle.

Healthy space allows perspective to develop.

Healthy space allows your wife to reflect on the relationship without feeling pressured.

Ironically, many positive signs during separation begin to appear only after pressure is removed from the situation.

Don’t Let Fear Convince You That She’s Gone Forever

One of the biggest challenges during separation is managing fear.

Your mind naturally starts asking questions:

What if she meets someone else?

What if she’s already moved on?

What if these are actually signs a wife is not coming back after separation?

Those fears are understandable.

But fear is often a poor predictor of reality.

Many marriages that eventually reconcile go through periods of uncertainty where neither spouse knows exactly what the future will look like.

That’s why it’s important not to confuse temporary distance with permanent loss.

Focus Less on the Negative Signs and More on Your Growth

There are certainly signs your wife doesn’t want to reconcile that should be taken seriously.

Likewise, there are signs your separated spouse wants to reconcile that should be encouraging.

But your primary focus should not be on trying to control her decisions.

Your primary focus should be on improving yourself.

Work on your confidence.

Work on your emotional stability.

Work on your communication skills.

Work on becoming the healthiest version of yourself.

Not only is that beneficial for you personally, but it also positions you more favorably if reconciliation becomes possible.

Check this out: Signs Your Husband Doesn’t Love You: 11 Painful Signals You Shouldn’t Ignore

Before We Discuss the Signs Your Wife Wants to Reconcile

Before we get into the three biggest signs your wife wants to reconcile after separation, remember this:

Don’t spend your days chasing signs.

Don’t spend your days trying to decode every action.

Don’t spend your days obsessing over what your wife may or may not be thinking.

Focus on your own growth.

Focus on your own confidence.

Focus on becoming the best version of yourself.

Because when you do that, you’ll be in a much better position to recognize the genuine signs your wife wants to reconcile—and avoid misinterpreting the signs your wife doesn’t want to reconcile.

Now let’s look at the three strongest signs your wife wants to reconcile after separation.

I want to share with you the “3 Signs My separated wife wants to reconcile”.

So there are three signs that I want to share with you,

…there are probably a couple more signs than three, but these three are the most important as far as I can see.

You didn’t just get here overnight like your separation did not just happen overnight, right?

Things started to happen probably over years, for the most part it’s over a year.

Bottom line is that over a period of time, there was a breakdown in your relationship or in your marriage and it led to a separation.

It’s not a matter of right and wrong as usual, it’s not a matter if who is more right who is more wrong.

It’s about who wants the marriage back and who wants to get back together.

Whoever is the one who wants the marriage back is the one that needs to seemingly do most of the work,

I used the word seemingly very carefully because a lot of time people may be quiet.

They may seem like they shut down and they don’t want the marriage back,

…but they are in fact doing most of the emotional work involved in potentially getting the marriage back.

It’s painful for anyone to want to end a marriage, even if they’re the one initiating in ending the marriage.

It’s a painful thing to go through for both the person who shuts down and the person who got shut down on.

With that being said, let’s get into the 3 Signs:

1. She is friendly.

PREVIOUS POST: How do I deal with an Annoying Wife?

So if she’s being friendly, it’s not a 100% green light but it’s somewhat a yellow light.

You know there are certain countries, just in case you don’t know,

There are certain countries in the world that the yellow light comes on first before the green light comes on.

Here in the United States, it’s not like that.

It goes from red to green and then you can take off, but there’s some certain part of the world where it goes to yellow first.

Just like saying “Get ready you’re about to take off” right?

You don’t want to look up for some kind of yellow light and that’s usually when she’s being friendly.

It’s not a guarantee that she’s ready to get back together, but at that point in time, you also can let down your guard.

See, you may think you’re the one that wants the marriage back and you’re the one doing most of the work.

Like I said earlier, that’s not necessarily true.

That would only be true if there is no emotion involved in the situation.

Some people, the way they shut down is by literally expressing to you that they want out,

…some people are by begging that they want to keep the marriage.

You can in fact be saying “I want to keep the marriage”, but in fact you have exited and that’s what caused the breakdown of the marriage (topic for another day).

Again, if she’s being friendly, that could be a sign that she’s ready to reconcile,

…that doesn’t mean you should run towards her and start going crazy.

You’ll find out why I say that in sign number 3.

2. She Spends Time Around You.

TRENDING: 5 Tricks to Fix Your Marriage ❤️

Typically, when somebody is not open to the idea of reconciling, they don’t want to spend time with you.

As a matter of fact, you’ll notice that even if they have to drop off babies, they want to drop off the babies and just keep it moving.

If they have to end up in a situation in the room with you, with other friends, they tend to avoid that,

… because they’re going through the emotional turmoils of the breakdown of the relationship.

They feel hurt, the keyword is Feeling Hurt.

So you don’t want to dwell on the fact that they are hurt or maybe you’re the one that hurt them.

You don’t wanna be too particular about that.

If they feel hurt, validate that and it’s okay, it doesn’t mean you hurt them but they feel hurt.

So that’s typically what happens when a person is exiting a relationship or they’re not in a position to reconcile.

They don’t want to spend time with you.

But with time, if you give them time, they tend to look into the past with a rose gold color lens.

They’ll look at the good things if you stay out of their face, if you give them that time.

So if you’ve given them that time and they start to spend some time with you.

Subconsciously they start to forget the bad experiences that made them decide that they wanted to exist in the first place and they start to spend time with you…

That could be a good sign that they want to reconcile.

3. You Have Worked on Yourself.

HAVE YOU SEEN THIS: More Video on our YouTube Channel

See, it doesn’t matter if you feel like you’re not the one at fault.

It doesn’t matter if you feel like you’re the one that’s been lifting or carrying the marriage or relationship for a long time.

Something happened and usually it’s something about yourself about how you handle yourself emotionally.

We don’t know what that is unless I talk to you personally but something happened for sure 100% that was also part of the reason why the marriage or the relationship broke down.

Whatever that thing that happened, whatever that thing is, you need to figure it out

…and you need to work on yourself first, before you try to reconcile with your wife.

If you don’t, the next breakdown is gonna be worse and it could be a lot more damaging.

One of the things here is that you need to understand that time and patients are part of the formula to reconciling and bringing your marriage back to where you want it to be.

Into bliss and to happiness right.

So don’t shut yourself, don’t shortchange yourself when it comes to the time that’s required to do that,

…work on yourself.

If you’ve made sure that you’ve worked on yourself, you will also find out that sign #1 and #2 probably already started to play out.

Meaning they are being friendly (#1) and then they start to spend time around you (#2).

They could blame it on the children for any other reasons, it’s because of friends,

…but they are okay with the idea of spending time around you.

It’s usually a sign that you’ve worked on yourself, which is sign #3.

Those are the three signs that it may be time that your separated wife wants to reconcile with you.

Just make sure those three things are in place and then you can potentially look for signs to come in and ask for a date or to have a conversation,

But if you don’t see those signs, if you haven’t worked on yourself especially #3, don’t bother.

It’s not worth it to be in a toxic relationship or marriage, it’s just never worth it.

You wanna be in a relationship where people respect each other, where people are absolutely happy.

Giving each other freedom to be in that relationship, it needs to feel like freedom, period.

That’s all I have for you right now.

All you have to do is pay for the membership, It’s a one time fee.

We put a nice deal over there for you, you’re gonna get over $500 worth of bonuses.

Just for being a part of the membership or family here, where we basically work together to nurture marriages, to nurture families, to make sure that you don’t become a statistic.

That’s 50% horrible statistics of marriages falling apart.

That’s all I for you on this episode, we’ll see on the next one.

Peace.

Check this out: 5 Signs a Marriage Is Ending (And How to Know If It’s Over)

How Often Do Separated Couples Reconcile?

While every marriage is different, reconciliation after separation is more common than many people realize. A separation does not automatically mean a marriage is headed for divorce. In fact, many couples use separation as an opportunity to gain perspective, address unhealthy patterns, and determine whether the relationship is worth rebuilding. The likelihood of reconciliation often depends on factors such as the reasons for the separation, the willingness of both spouses to grow, and whether communication remains open. Rather than focusing on statistics, it’s usually more productive to focus on creating the conditions that make reconciliation possible.

How Do I Know If My Separated Wife Wants to Reconcile?

If your separated wife wants to reconcile, her actions will typically reveal more than her words. Positive signs during separation may include initiating conversations, showing curiosity about your life, maintaining consistent communication, expressing appreciation, bringing up positive memories, or showing interest in spending time together. She may also become more receptive to discussing the relationship and future possibilities. However, it’s important not to overanalyze every interaction. The strongest signs your wife wants to reconcile are usually patterns of behavior that demonstrate continued emotional investment rather than isolated moments of friendliness or politeness.

What Makes a Separated Wife Come Back?

There is rarely one single thing that makes a separated wife come back. More often, reconciliation happens when she feels safe and secure. But also when she begins to see meaningful change, emotional maturity, and a healthier dynamic than the one that contributed to the separation. This doesn’t mean becoming someone else or trying to convince her to return. It means focusing on your own growth, improving communication skills, managing emotions effectively, and demonstrating genuine confidence and stability. When a wife has the freedom to reflect without pressure, she may begin comparing the future she imagines without the marriage to the possibility of rebuilding a stronger relationship. Ultimately, authentic personal growth tends to be far more persuasive than chasing, pleading, or trying to force an outcome.

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5 KEYS TO REKINDLING ATTRACTION DURING SEPARATION (How To Make Your Husband Want You All The Time)

We are enjoying having this conversation with you in the comment area.  Leave a question in the comment and we will address it.  If it’s more comfortable, you can also send us an email to [email protected]

In this video, we are adding some context to an answer we gave to Queen some few weeks back.  Be sure to check out that video.  

It’s called “Unwanted Separation? Use THESE 5 Tips!” It was also a response to an original video called “Ignoring Your Spouse During Separation 💔”

Here is her response to that video.

“Thank you Lola and Ola. I am grateful for you guys. You have opened a new perspective to me. I believe I should work on myself now moving forward. The period of sorrow and grief is coming to an end. 

About the question if I am a selfish person, the answer is no. I have always given people my time, love and affection. I’d rather love others first. 

I don’t know how to only focus on me. It’s not healthy. I’d rather give to those who need me. I never put myself first but look for the good of those around me. 

Hence I helped hubby become who he is today. Now that he’s left I don’t understand what I did wrong to be honest. 

We spoke a few days ago and he wanted to know what I have been up to. I don’t know why he suddenly is interested to know about my whereabouts but he will not disclose what he’s doing or how he feels. Which I find strange that he’s obsessed with knowing what I am about. 

I think I need to be more attractive and work on myself more like you mentioned. I will revive my passions and allow time to heal like they say. 

For now I will focus on what makes me happy and keep me focused. I believe he’s still my husband. I am also going to download your free book now.” ~ Queen

So here we go.  To add some context to Queen’s comment, we have created 5 keys to rekindling attraction from a seduction standpoint during a separation.

Let’s get into it.

Key Number 5

The Art of Obsession

The Art of Obsession

As always, this is easier said than done.  But it’s a simple concept.  What makes it complex is the complex human mind.

When you experience rejection at any level,  it breeds obsession and anxiety.  

But when you are able to garner some self-control and back off just a little bit, you can successfully transfer that obsession and anxiety to the other party.

It also depends on how much damage may have occurred during the break down of the relationship.  

If your separated spouse is not the exception minority with no emotional blood flowing in their vein, this works 100% of the time.

So it’s pretty normal for the obsession to flip to the other side when you take time to back off and allow nature to take its course.

If your partner needs space, things are bad already and you probably need more space than you realize.

Key Number 4

Don’t Fake The Flip

So, I want you to allow the obsession and the anxiety to flip from you to your partner naturally and organically.  There are gurus out there teaching people to fake it.

You can’t afford to fake this stuff because that would be a lie and that would typically mean you have to keep lying to cover up lies.  It’s not worth it because it’s too much energy trying to keep up with it.


It needs to be organic and this awareness right here will make it a little hard.  

But the way to mitigate that is to really take this rare advantage of time apart to build yourself in every way you can think of; physically, emotionally and spiritually.

Leave very little room to sit around and allow your mind to wander around about things you can’t control such as sorrow and grief.

If you can do it, that’s obviously time spent away from obsessing over your estranged partner and that much time for them to start wondering about what you are up to.

That’s literally a form of attraction.

It’s organic and natural and proof that you can potentially rekindle attraction in a healthy way so that you can embrace it when you are ready.

Key Number 3

Don’t Run An Empty Cup

Don't Run An Empty Cup

As “Queen” just acknowledged, you can’t afford to pour love into others from an empty cup; it will only drain your energy.  

Yes we advocate for focusing on “giving” in a healthy relationship and not the falsehood of the “give and take” ideology that a bunch of selfish people are running around with on social media.

But please, do not take us out of context.  You simply cannot give what you don’t already have.  

We get this question all the time… “You are telling us to just GIVE but what if we are giving so much that the other person is not reciprocating?”

Good question.  

But there is no better way to tell me that you are not giving anything to yourself.  You are emptying out yourself to your partner.

That’s the only way you can have time to notice that they don’t reciprocate but you are not necessarily wrong; just a thought to consider.

And worse, you are setting them up with false metrics of expectations that are based purely on your disappointed emotions. 

You can’t win together like that. You might win alone and effectively destroy the relationship.  But let’s be guided.

When you can demonstrate the ability to take care of yourself, there is almost nothing sexier than that when it comes to rekindling attraction again.

And of course, they naturally can’t wait to get on your good side.

Key Number 2

Be Indifferent

Once you’ve managed to organically flip that obsession and anxiety over to the other side, do not prematurely engage.

Sure it’s attractive but it needs to be tested with time and persistence which must be demonstrated on all sides.

Don’t play games with this if you haven’t gone through an outright rejection from your spouse.  That will make it fake, manipulative and it can backfire badly.

But in the case of what “Queen” described, she needs to disconnect as much as possible from wondering what she did wrong and why he is suddenly obsessed.

The bottom line is that he is obsessed because that’s attraction at play but more importantly, how she responds to it needs to showcase indifference.

What that means is that how you feel is neither here nor there.  You are okay with whatever the outcome is and you will take your time because you are busy learning how to take care of yourself.

It might drive one or both of you wild.


But the attraction needs to be tested for strength because there is a real reason why a separation became reality in the first place.

It doesn’t matter if you are “the man” or “the woman”.  The same attraction principle is applicable if you are feeling the emotions of rejection.

You can re-engage your seduction power and redirect the course.

Key Number 1

Self Love Is Still key

Self Love Is Still key

What if you lost your partner forever?  Yea.  What if?  If you can’t handle that reality in your mind right now, it’s probably showing as needy behavior on the surface.

That’s not sexy.

It’s like no wonder they are running away from that.

The moment they can see that you are capable of loving yourself adequately, they will always regret a decision of not working on your relationship.

That self-love will attract a better companionship to you with or without your spouse; it’s non-negotiable. 

And again, we are not talking to selfish people.  Self-love as a religious talking point and ideology can also destroy you and everything you care about.

We are speaking from experience.  

We share our own story inside the book “GET MY MARRIAGE BACK” which  you can download for free at www.GetMyMarriageBack.com

Please support this video by hitting the thumbs up and share with us below what you’d like us to cover on the next video.

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5 “Do’s & Don’ts” During Separation in Marriage (ft Obodo Oyinbo TV)

Quick story.  So my husband was on Aunty B’s platform, Obodo Oyinbo TV, in the past few days oh my God… he ended up becoming an overnight detective.

A man had called him before he called into a show making wild claims about women in Nigeria and as usual, it was obvious to him that this man was speaking from personal experience.

The truth is that we have both men and women who perpetuate this terrible behavior once they have had  traumatic experiences in marriage or relationships.

And nothing good comes out of it.

So we want to share 5 “do’s & don’ts” if you happen to be in a separation from your marriage at this moment.  

We  know you will be tempted to destroy your future relationship if you don’t know these things so please, pay attention.

Thing Number 5

Don’t Focus on Whose Fault; It’s Irrelevant

After about 30,000 views, what I always knew was confirmed.  He was projecting from his personal experiences.

He is presently separated from his wife who he had met in Nigeria while visiting.  So the wife had recently asked for divorce.

So he decided he wanted to help others who may be captured by the evil women who are poor and live in Nigeria; according to him.

After getting dragged on that platform so many times, there was one thing that really stood out to me and this is it.

He was obsessed with who was at fault for the demise of the marriage.  Not just that, we are talking about a need to spell out every fault at every stop since he met the lady.

If you are in separation and you want the outcome of the process to be positive, you have two choices.

Decide that no one is at fault or… 

The 2nd choice, which is “both of you are at fault”; unless of course, someone had a gun to their head during the decision to engage in a romantic way.

Thing Number 4

Don’t Attempt Saving Others Before Healing

Don’t Attempt Saving Others Before Healing

So we get it.  You’ve just gone through a very traumatic situation and experience.  Your experience is valid but you need to believe that.

Naturally, if you consider yourself “nice” or “good”, you might want to jump out there and save everyone else from people like your ex-partner who is now a bad person I guess…

Don’t do it.  You will end up re-creating your own version of your experience in others and they will effectively project it further into our society… 

…when it is in-fact, not necessarily their experience.

It’s a fact that your ex-partner had their own experience. This is why those who don’t know any better end up calling each other liars; making things worse.

Stay away from trying to help others until you make sure you’ve gone through healing.

And have peace with the idea that it’s not necessarily anyone’s fault.

Thing Number 3

Let Go In Every Sense

Let Go In Every Sense

Generally speaking, letting go is one of the hardest things for humans to do.  People would yell out things like “I don’t care” with such anger.

You would be left to wonder…”Do you believe that you don’t care or you need to convince yourself even more?”

It’s confusing at best.  Sure you should be able to tell your story.  But you should only do it within a controlled context and environment.

Letting go, self control and awareness is key but hard.  Have you noticed that you enjoy talking so much about your ex-partner particularly in a bad light?

Thing Number 2

Engage a Wise Counsel

There is a good chance you are not able to smell your own breath.  You can barely see your own nose.  Maybe if you calm down, you can at least see a blurry version of it.

The point I am making is this.  Separation from a marriage is tough on a human heart.  Take some time off and engage wise counsel.

We all have a blind spot by default.  So how much more when everything you believed when it comes to romance is being questioned.

Thing Number 1

Don’t Generalize! It’s a sign of a weak person…

Don’t Generalize! It’s a sign of a weak person…

Let me ask that question I asked previously again.  Have you noticed that you enjoy talking so much about your ex-partner particularly in a bad light?

Or maybe this time, you’ve managed to camouflage it as a generalized story that you have become an evangelist for.

You find yourself saying things like “American women are not good wives.”  You’ve perfected the art of saying “All Nigerian men are cheaters.”

I’m just gonna be straight up with you.  There is no better way to tell us that you need counseling and possibly therapy than showcasing a habit of generalizing.

It’s a red flag.  You shouldn’t be advising or trying to save anyone.

It’s projection at best.  There is no way that you know enough people to be capable of generalizing in the name of helping someone.

You will end up making more people toxic than you help if at all..

Check this out: Hardest Stage of Marriage: Why Years 7–10 Test Couples Most

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Unwanted Separation? Use THESE 5 Tips! (re: Ignoring Your Spouse During Separation 💔)

Unwanted Separation? Use THESE 5 Tips! So we received a comment on one of the best videos we’ve ever done called “Ignoring Your Spouse During Separation” from one of our 1,125 extremely valuable subscribers on YouTube; Queen.

Make sure you search and check out that video once  you finish watching this video.

She says… And I quote

“Going thru separation. I love and miss my husband. He asked to be alone for a year. What do I do while we are living apart?”

Queen. I’m sorry you are going through this.  Separation is not easy on anyone.  As devastating as it sounds, it sometimes can yield positive outcomes. 

In fact, we are going to share 5 tips with you on how to dramatically increase the chance of making this season productive for you especially in spite of what it may feel like right now.

Tip Number 5

Identify Why

The marriage institution is exactly that; an institution.  And all disrespect of the institution will lead to a terrible outcome which is a legal or spiritual evaporation of the marriage.

One of such disrespects happens when people get into marriages that lack explicitly identified purpose.  It’s also synonymous with a marriage with no clear vision from the leader.

So if there is no leader, even if it’s temporarily, there is no vision and things fall apart.

At this point, Queen… you have to be realistic and identify your own life mission and purpose.  

It’s going to be instrumental in attracting your husband back to you if he belongs there in the first place.

Major focus has to be directed to building yourself up because it’s about being worthy of attracting what you desire; even if that’s your marriage and/or your husband.

Whatever you engage henceforth should either be your passion or some type of stepping stone towards your passion.

Identify Why

Tip Number 4

Forgive Yourself

There is a tricky fine line between holding yourself accountable and not forgiving yourself.  Everything in life is a double edged sword that can cut both ways.

Holding yourself accountable when your marriage seems to be failing is no different.  You want to make sure that you’ve forgiven yourself for at least being what you may be perceiving as failure.

After all, failure is the stepping stone towards all forms of success. 

Guilt, blame, condemnation and judgement will work against you because they will consume 10 times the  energy you could use to improve yourself in order to attract love and your desires again. 

Tip Number 3 

Let Him Go

He wants time off, let him go.   The truth is that negotiating desire is always a terrible strategy because it leads back into this vicious cycle of resenting yourself.

If your husband has asked to be alone for a year, the reality is that he doesn’t want to be alone because he is human; a social being like the rest of us.  He just doesn’t want to be with you again.

At least subconsciously, you also know this to be true so you naturally fight to hold on to your husband evidently by begging, calling obsessively, manipulation and other strategies that only repel and not attract love.

So the fear becomes, “what if I let go and then he gets with someone else”?

Okay.  What if he does?  I ask you.  Can you survive that reality?  If you can’t survive that reality, where is the sexy self-confidence and self-esteem that attracted him in the first place? 

It’s little to no wonder why he doesn’t want to be with you.

Here is another reality. That’s just how he felt the moment it was said.  It’s not necessarily how he is going to feel once he smells that you don’t need him ever again.  

To want him and to need him are two different things.  No one wants to be with a needy person.

So the first step is to let him go in order to let your magic… maybe God…. do its thing.  

There is more.

Let Him Go

Tip Number 2

Build Self Love

We’ve seen a lot of people running around social media and different types of conversations talking about “self love”.

Let’s be honest.  Some people are too selfish and should not be talking about self love if they don’t want to self-sabotage when it comes to attracting authentic love over time.

But in your case Queen, rejection breeds obsession.  So you are probably pouring from an empty cup and not taking care of yourself enough.  That’s not attractive nor is it sustainable.

In this season for you, the work is in taking care of and loving up on yourself.  

I understand it’s hard when you experience rejection especially when it involves a potential break up of your family.

But remember that everything goes back to attraction and desire which you should never negotiate.  People, including your husband, really have no choice but to mimic the level of self love that you have for yourself.

At the minimum, people will mimic your level of self-respect.  Focus on doing things you love and for yourself during this period and don’t have ultimatums on doing that.

Make it a lifestyle.

I have a question for you.  Are you naturally a selfish person?

Use the comment area below to share your answer with us.

There is a chance that you are already not a selfish person.  So it’s time to pivot and it’s your best chance of attracting love with or without your husband.

I know you are probably so obsessed that you don’t want to hear about love outside of your husband.  But think about this deeply.  Love is love and it really wouldn’t matter when you are in-love.

It also doesn’t matter because loving yourself will make you more attractive and therefore increase your chances of attracting anyone to desire you; hopefully your husband.

And last but not least.

Tip Number 1

Look Out For Clarity

Okay.  I don’t want you to set yourself up because honestly that marriage is gone.  Because even if your husband comes back to you, you will have to build a new foundation.

When we say look out for clarity, we need you to do that from a space of selfishness and what is good for your own life and the rest of your life.

I don’t want you to sit around and start expecting your husband to suddenly decide to come back to his senses.  Nothing in life is guaranteed.

Look Out For Clarity

If he comes back, good for him… and for you I hope.

With these tips, you will definitely influence him if he is human like the rest of us because he will wonder and become unsure of where you stand. 

That will effectively drive his attraction towards you in an upwards direction.

But you can’t control what other people do.  You can only control how you respond to life and consequently control what you attract.

Things will start to align when you let go and genuinely become capable of enjoying every moment of your life without needing him.

We are speaking from experience.  We share our own story inside the book “GET MY MARRIAGE BACK” which  you can download for free at www.GetMyMarriageBack.com

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