5 Rules to Follow When Separation Starts to Work For Your Marriage💔

In this lesson, we will be sharing five rules to follow if you have been separated for a while but things are starting to seem great between you two again; these rules will help prevent sabotaging the attraction.

So Calvin has been separated from his wife for eight months now, hardly talking, haven’t seen each other or interacted at all.

The loss of their pet brought them back together and they are now in talking terms; they are also hanging out every now and then and enjoying it.

But he is afraid that their toxic behavior will creep back in if they go all-in and start talking about their marriage again.

How do you make sure you don’t mess things up if separation from your marriage is starting to work in favor of the marriage?

Shall we?

Yes.  My name is OLA.

This is actually good news; Calvin has clearly done a great job to get in this space.

The rest of the story now depends on Calvin’s ability to follow these simple, lightweight but crucial rules that will reduce his chances of self-sabotaging.

By the way, there are family laws that guide separation and divorces, so it never hurts to seek legal counsel in the process.

Rule #5 – Enjoy Today & The Little Moments

PREVIOUS POST: 5 “Lethal” Mistakes That Kills ATTRACTION To Your Husband💔

One of the things that you have likely taken for granted in your relationship with your wife  are the little moments of just “being.”

What often happens after separation is that you start to value the little things, gestures and moments… I want you to set a plan in motion to keep it that way forever.

A direct cause of anxiety, torture and suffering in relationships and marriages is the obsession with the past and future.  

It makes you feel that the grass may be greener on the other side.  And then you start to fantasize and compare your partners or relationship to others.

Rule #4 – Focus On The Upsides & The Positives.

Still in the spirit of gratitude, I want you to let go and release yourself from the terrible experience that may have led to the separation from your wife in the first place.

As usual, this is easier said than done but stay tuned for rule #1. 

It will help you prepare properly for the release and re-focusing all that energy on celebrating the good times and experiences you are starting to recreate with your wife again.

For now, I want you to focus on everything about her that you fell in love with on day-1.  Add them to these same good experiences you are having right now.

Rule #3 – Don’t Put Marriage On A Pedestal.

TRENDING: 5 Signs That Separation May Be Good For Your Marriage 💔

A terrible mistake that a lot of married couples make is to abandon the underlying relationship while stressing each other out about the “marriage” title.”

While marriage is a beautiful thing, it will stress your relationship out if you put it on a pedestal above your friendship, unity and freedom.

Marriage has become an ideology and a religion that many people would kill the actual relationship with their spouse for.

Let go of all extreme ideologies and refocus back on rebuilding friendship with your wife one moment at a time.

Rule #2 – Co-Mingling Fear & Love Is Not Sustainable

Naturally, your guards and all kinds of walls are up when you find yourself and marriage in separation; I understand but that’s fear.

Fear is an emotion that is natural to all of us when we go through traumatic experiences in life.

So it makes sense that a part of you doesn’t want to be too forward with talking about serious topics like marriage, what happened, and getting back together officially.

But I want to share a technique with you that works all the time.  

It is based on the simple fact that fear and love cannot coexist in the same space over a long period of time. One of them will prevail.

So it is okay to shoot your shot as soon as you feel safe enough to do so without rushing it but again, what does that mean?

At this stage of rekindling things, focus on dating and courting her fearlessly provided she is really the one that you want on any given day; don’t worry about tomorrow.

Wait for her to desire the idea of making things official again.  She needs to feel safe and secure and she will bring it up and send you clear signals.

Rule #1 – Engage Self-development, Seduction & Attraction Skills.

HAVE YOU SEEN THIS: More Video on our YouTube Channel

Declare rule 2 to 5 useless without rule #1.  She and the relationship will test you over and over and again so you need emotional strength and intelligence.

She will not be testing you deliberately for the most part so you do not get to judge her; it’s the nature of a typical woman within a romantic context.

Are you going to be man enough to pass these tests while attracting respect, trust, submission and passionate sexual experience with the woman you love?

There is a massive opportunity playing out right now. Are you prepared for it?

If you feel we can help you personally, feel free to go to www.GetMyMarriageBack.com, download the free book, and book a free 30 minutes coaching session with us.

Don’t forget to hit the like button and check out the video on the screen for more information on how to build attraction out in your marriage from all ends.

“My Wife DISRESPECTS Me” 9 Points Advice for you Especially in Separation… ❤️

In this lesson, I am sharing a 9-point marriage separation advice in order to give you the best chance to attract your spouse back in love with you.

At the bottom of this page, you will find the question that inspired this lesson.

Marriage Separation Advice - My wife disrespects me

(1) Give Yourself Space

It’s most likely that your spouse has asked you for space.

So if that’s the case, it’s very important that you don’t see it as a bad idea because frankly you probably need the space more.

You just can’t see that, because rejection breeds obsession.

Take advantage of the space apart to build a better “you”.

(2) Don’t Overrate Affairs

While your spouse may be distracted by an emotional or physical affair with another person, don’t highlight it.

The affair will never be worth what you have already shared with your spouse

But it is important that you showcase being unbothered by anything or anyone outside of the relationship you have with him or her.

The worst thing you can do is to spend your space apart bickering about affairs; it will only expand and you will push your spouse further away.

(3) It Takes One But…

Insisting that you stay together is not going to help save your marriage as much as attracting your spouse back.

It only takes one person to create attraction but that requires a process and insisting otherwise will interrupt that process of attraction.

Instead, let go as it only takes “you” to build attraction which is the single most important thing that is missing right now.

(4) Don’t Use/Abuse Children

The marriage separation period will come with a lot of temptations

And one of them is trying to inflict emotional abuse and blackmail on your spouse.

Another one is abusing your children as a tool to accomplish that goal.

It always backfires.

The most common one, believe it or not, is not as obvious as you may think.

It happens more in the form of manipulation under the pretense of protecting the child or children.

What you want to do is stay focused on what you want and don’t want

And leave the children out of it even if that’s painful for you emotionally.

Your emotional feelings are temporary.

The only exception to this, is physical abuse of the children; in that case, it would be non-negotiable to get the children removed from harm’s way.

(5) After 3 Months, You are Free

It’s not advisable to engage in transgressions with other people during separation but we are all humans.

Technically, you are free to move on after 3 months of lack of sexual relationship when it is not medically related in my personal opinion.

But also in my personal opinion, the most profitable and worthwhile thing to work on in this period is self growth.

If you don’t, transgression and the lifestyle that comes with it can destroy everything you care about.

It can be even worse when it’s done in retaliation.

If you decide to move on, seek legal counsel to avoid exposing you and/or your children to unfavorable legal loopholes.

(6) More Actions/Less Talking

That should be pretty clear but be careful not to confuse certain inaction with emotional centered-ness.

For example, don’t abandon your children and/or your normal responsibilities in the name of less talking.

That would be irresponsible and such behavior will continue to lower your spouse’s attraction towards you.

Just keep in mind that changed behavior is the best apology.

So for the most part, verbal apology will work against you because of the expectation for instant results.

Stay away from arguments, approval seeking behaviors and focus on building your self during this period.

(7) You Allow Disrespect

If there are any type of disrespect and/or disregard from your spouse during your separation, ask yourself first,

“How did I put myself in that position?”

“How did I allow that”?

You need to take the time to extract the answer to that question as it will help with clarity as you move into the new phase of your marriage.

The bottom-line and the result of this exercise should be that no one should be taking anyone for granted again.

When you take yourself for granted, your spouse will see it as a permission to take you for granted if they are weak like most people.

(8) Never Bribe for Sex

Don’t manipulate with whatever you do for your spouse, children and family at this time as a bribe for sex.

It will work against your desire.

Do it if you find it honorable to do and you don’t have to if you don’t feel like it.

The worst thing you can do is do it and then blame them for not reciprocating.

(9) Work on Yourself

That should be self explanatory.

Use the marriage separation period to build yourself and attract the love and affection that you deserve.

It’s simple but I agree…

It’s easier said than done.

Below is a question for us to address with this lesson…

“ I really enjoy your content on IG: @LOLAandOLA and I need to ask you a question.

In April 2017, my wife said she wanted space for 2 weeks because we were not in a good place and she was distracted by an affair at the time.

Initially, I objected and wanted us to get a fresh new start.

She did not return and recently found out she is in a full blown now having sexually intimate moments with her partner on the same bed as my 6 years old daughter who told me she’s uncomfortable.

As a christian, am I totally free without guilt to remarry even though we are not officially divorced.

I’m not going to crawl and beg her.

I did all I could to fight and save the marriage. But it’s clearly not working out.

She finds joy in disrespecting me and talking to me anyhow, rudely and distastefully.

Mind you, I am financially okay and earn 8-figures per annum.

I still give her monthly up-keep, 120K per month, for my daughters, excluding fees, clothing… until 2019 January when I stopped for many reasons.”

Enjoy the video.


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What should you not do during separation?

The number ONE thing to not do during separation is to NOT focus on yourself and building yourself. When you focus on building yourself, you will attract the love and marriage you desire and deserve.

Is separation good for a marriage?

Yes because distance does makes the heart fonder. In other words, space creates attraction and it is encouraged if things have gotten very toxic.

How do you cope with a marriage separation?

It is important to focus on building your self worth and value in other to attract the love and marriage you desire and deserve. Write out your vision of your desired marriage and hold it close to you. Stay out of unnecessary contact with your spouse during this period.

How long should a marriage separation last?

It needs to last for as long as it takes for your spouse to stop taking you for granted or for as long as you need to find your self worth and value; whichever is longer, it is worth it.

Does a separation help a marriage?

“Distance makes the heart fonder.” In other words, space creates attraction and it is encouraged if things have gotten very toxic in your marriage. So it is winning if you both could agree to a separation.

What is a marriage separation?

It is an agreement between a couple to spend some time apart in order to find happiness in the marriage again.

When is marital separation a good idea?

It is encouraged if things have gotten very toxic in your marriage.